Feminist Wife

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A (69)I just read an article posted by Bust Magazine called “15 Ways to Have a Feminist Wedding”. Some of the points the author made did not pertain to me because the traditional wedding ritual in Israel is very different from the one in the States or other countries. The rest of the points I found to be complete and utter bullshit. So here is my response to all points:

Proposing is an equal opportunity event
My husband didn’t propose to me and I didn’t propose to him. One day we talked about it over dinner and just decided that this is what we’re gonna do.

An engagement ring for all or no one
I wanted a ring and he didn’t. Where is the problem?

Pass on the bride’s parents permission
If my husband had asked my dad if he could marry me, we would have had a good laugh. We’re not orthodox and we’re not in the 1950s. Nowadays, I doubt anybody does it in Israel.

Everyone pays for the wedding
Nope. My parents paid for the Hinna. My husband’s parents paid for the wedding.

It’s the groom’s day too
It’s also the day of the parents of the bride and the parents of the groom. We all planned the wedding together.

Invite men to the wedding shower
Showers are not a thing in Israel. Wedding showers or baby showers. So irrelevant.

Have diverse wedding parties
Not sure what she means by that… we had a surprise engagement party at Blaze and a Hinna. Neither of us had bachelor or bachelorette parties.

Drop the terms bridesmaid or maid of honor
Again, no such thing in Israel. My “maid of honor” was my dog.

Don’t let your father give you away
I wanted both my parents to walk me down the aisle. So that’s how it was. My parents walked me, and my husband’s parents walked him.

Ditch the garter and bouquet toss
Yet another tradition that is not practiced in Israel.

Cut a rug with any parent
Whatever you say dude. I’ll dance with anybody I want.

Name-change is a two-way street
That was the point that pissed me off the most. Name-change is anybody’s choice. I wasn’t going to make my husband change his name. And the reason I wanted to change mine was so that I could have the same family name as my fucking family! My husband and my kids will be Bar Lev. I want to be that too. What’s so wrong with that?

Ditch the term Mrs.
I’m not Mrs. or Ms. I’m giveret. So fuck you.

Replace the terms “husband” and “wife”
Yet another pisser-offer. I LOVE it when my husband calls me his wife (or rather isha) and I love referring to my husband as my husband (or rather baal). There is nothing that keeps my husband from using “isha” and “feministit” in the same sentence. Nothing wrong with it either.

Don’t let him carry you over the threshold
Not usually done in Israel. In fact, I don’t understand how anybody can do that. This is supposed to happen AFTER the wedding, right? When both of you are shitfaced and sore all over from dancing like maniacs. So how exactly can your husband carry you anywhere when he can hardly hold himself up? Ridiculous.

One of the comments on this article was “How to have a feminist wedding: Be a feminist. Have a wedding.”

Seriously. I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Peace, love and next stupid article from Bust: “How to be a feminist mother”

 

 

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Bleeder of the Pack

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Happy International Women’s Day! Here’s to being a proud female, a fierce feminist, and a crafty creator! To all my fellow sisters of the revolution, you’re fucking beautiful!|

Treat yourself or the lovely women in your life to an IWD gift from the PMS Mess Etsy Shop. Use the coupon code IWD2016 and get 20% off any purchase!

PMS banner

PMS Mess is my new Etsy Shop. There, you will find all the items that I produce by hand, sell with freebies, and ship with love!

Messy and magical items in the shop include:

Purple Myrtle Squeegy – my PMS Perzine

PMS cover 1 PMS issue 4 DSC02449 DSC03041

Fallopian Falafel – my compilation zine

Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel

Alternative Jerusalem – a series of awesome postcards I designed

Draining1 Metal Proud1 Slut

Kickass care packages

PMS collection Care Package FF

All items come with freebies such as feminist zines or minizines or stickers or patches or my band’s CD!

Peace, love and feminist forever!

Get Messy on V-Day!

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V-Day special! For this weekend only, use the coupon code “VDAY2016” on the PMS Mess Etsy Shop and get 14% off any purchase! (14% as in February 14, get it?)

Treat yourself to feminist zines, music and postcards or get a unique gift for a kickass feminist friend!

Messy and magical items in the shop include:

Purple Myrtle Squeegy – my PMS perzine

PMS cover 1 PMS issue 4 DSC02449 DSC03041

Fallopian Falafel – my compilation zine

Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel

Alternative Jerusalem – a series of awesome postcards I designed

Draining1 Metal Proud1 Slut

Kickass care packages

PMS collection Care Package FF

All items come with freebies such as feminist zines or minizines or stickers or patches or my band’s CD!

Peace, love and mess up!

Riot Blah

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If you haven’t already figured it out, judging by the name of this blog, I am a huge riot grrrl fan, and I also identify as one. So it was clear that I couldn’t have a Fun-a-Day month of album-listening without some riot grrrl in it. I picked Bratmobile and Le Tigre because they’re bands that I already know and love but haven’t listened to all their albums. And I picked Julie Ruin because Kathleen Hanna is awesome. Unfortunately, the albums I picked didn’t reflect said awesomeness, to put it mildly. It was a terrific blow to my riot grrrl persona and I’ve never felt more disappointed in my choice of music.

Bratmobile-PottymouthDay 16:
Bratmobile – Pottymouth (3.5/5)
Back when I discovered riot grrrl, Bratmobile featured among my top bands along with Bikini Kill and L7. But back then, I just found a few of their songs on Limewire because HMV wasn’t selling any of their records. I listened to Pottymouth last Saturday expecting to hop around my living room to their fast beats, rough distortion and profane lyrics. But I didn’t. I mean, some of their songs sound like the same good old Bratmobile I know and love. But some of them just sound like grade-school playground teasing songs, with a profane twist. I’m pretty sure that this was exactly what Bratmobile was aiming for, judging by their name. But I think they could have done much better. A little more power, a little more spirit, and much more riot grrrl.

This_IslandDay 17:
Le Tigre – This Island (3.5/5)
I have Le Tigre’s self-titled album and I can honestly say that it is a completely different league than This Island. Le Tigre’s lyrics, vocals, distorted guitar and electro-pop sound effects are all so much better on their self-titled. Despite that, Kathleen Hanna’s vocals are as powerful as ever. But somehow, this record just didn’t do it for me. It needs to be said that TKO is an incredible song. I felt shivers up and down my spine when the verse flows into the chorus with a crescendo that multiplies by the guitars and the doubled vocals. If the entire record had been like that song, it would have been perfect. But with boring monotonous songs like “Nanny Nanny Boo Boo” and the title song, This Island is just bland.

Julie_Ruin_-_Julie_RuinDay 18:
Julie Ruin – Self-titled (2/5)
If Le Tigre and Bratmobile didn’t disappoint me enough, along comes Julie Ruin to finish the job. They sound just like Le Tigre, with less energy if that were even possible. I still love Kathleen Hanna’s vocals and a very few select songs are passable, but the music sucks. There is really no other way to say it. It sucks. There is no depth, no dimensions, no overwhelming sense of oh-my-god-I-can-feel-my-heart-swell. Where is the former brutality and rawness that is Bikini Kill? Julie fucking ruined it. I’m so disappointed and upset, I can’t get over it. Bikini Kill of the early 90’s is simply the best thing ever. No other riot grrrl projects can ever compare or even come close. Screw post-riot grrrl. So not for me.

What a stupid post to add on a riot grrrl fan site, seriously.

Fuck it, tomorrow I’m resuming my metal playlist with yet another CD of Kataklysm and then Astarte. Then some other metal bands I haven’t heard of before. I hope I will find some that will blow my face off like Winds of Plague did.

Peace, love and I miss growls.

PMS issue 1408

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I’m taking a short break from my Fun-a-Day CD reviews to inform you of something you absolutely must have.

Like chocolate and Advil, no PMS spree can go by awesomely without this latest issue of my zine. This is a full color issue featuring photos and stories about my phenomenal trip to Salem and my experience of my first time tabling at a real zine fest in Boston.

If you like zines and spooks, this is the zine for you!

It is now up for sale and for trade.

Check out these awesome pics and tell me you don’t crave this as much as you crave Ben & Jerry’s Cookies n’ Cream ice cream!

Peace, love and can you guess why it’s 1408?

Sleat My sKinney Throat

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SK_coversDay 7:
Sleater-Kinney – Self-Titled (5/5)

Back when I was just getting into riot grrrl, I was streaming songs off of the bands’ respective MySpace pages. MySpace was really the best resource to find bands that nobody knows.

Anyway, I heard and read a lot of great reviews about Sleater-Kinney. So I listened to one of their songs. But back then, for some reason, I found they weren’t aggressive enough for my tastes. I was looking for bands that sound exactly like or more aggressive and loud than Bikini Kill.

But maybe the Sleater-Kinney song I heard back then was one of their less extreme ones because when I listened to their first full album this weekend, I was BLOWN AWAY!

After the first couple of songs, I told my husband, “It’s cool. They’re totally riot grrrl, but not as extreme.” But soon thereafter came the shrieks and screams that is so common in the genre. With such throat-shredding screams, it’s no wonder that Sleater-Kinney wasted no time in rocketing to the top of my personal riot grrrl charts.

I can’t wait to listen to their later albums. I really hope they’re just as good because seriously, holy damn, I can’t believe I went through all these years without them!

Peace, love and Century Media bands coming soon!

 

Get Messy!

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Today is the International Day for the Elimination of Violence Against Women. For this reason, from November 25 to December 2, all proceeds from the PMS Mess Etsy shop will be donated to the Jerusalem Rape Crisis Center!

Please support the cause, buy zines, DIY art and postcards, and spread the word!

PMS banner

More abut the shop:

PMS Mess is my new Etsy shop. There, you will find all the items that I produce by hand, sell with freebies, and ship with love!

Messy and magical items in the shop include:

Purple Myrtle Squeegy – my PMS Perzine

PMS cover 1 PMS issue 4 DSC02449 DSC03041

Fallopian Falafel – my compilation zine

Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel Fallopian Falafel

Alternative Jerusalem – a series of awesome postcards I designed

Draining1 Metal Proud1 Slut

Kickass care packages

PMS collection Care Package FF

And more DIY art, such as patches and buttons, coming soon!

All items come with freebies such as feminist zines or minizines or stickers or patches or my band’s CD!

For more info, contact me at fallopian.falafel@gmail.com!