Blow Me Away

My mom loved the microwave I got her. She said she was planning on getting one but never got around to it. Since we’re still very backward in using this high tech shit, we still use the user’s manual to make stuff. Today, I made a complete fool of myself when I left a hard-boiled egg in the microwave for too long, and when I took it out, I poked at it with my fork and it literally blew up in my face. Seriously, it made a loud noise like when you pop a baloon and all the yellow stuff inside splattered all over the walls and the floor and my hair. It was such a riot, and it was so unexpected, I stood there for at least a minute trying to figure out what the fuck just happened.

Maybe I should just leave the microwave to my mom, as it is her gift and it was intended for her and her coffee anyways. I’ll stick to the good old method of the stove burners and the oven. Gotta love kitchen appliances.

And speaking about popping shit, I bought the micowave for popping popcorn, for fuck’s sake, not eggs. So I’m off to IGA get me some microwave popcorn, Orvil, or whatever the fuck, with extra butter.



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